and it's a leap of faith
8:06 pm - October 29, 2003

I just sent an e-mail to Bryan, telling him that I really, really want to meet him, and that I think we owe it to ourselves and to each other to see where this could go...I said that I love having him as a friend, but that I want to see if there's more. In previous e-mails where I've suggested this, it's just been a P.S. down at the bottom of the e-mail, and he's never said anything back about it. But this time, it was the only thing I asked him, it's all the e-mail was about. Not as easy to avoid.

I don't want to be pushy with him but I think it's time. I'm at a point where I really feel like I need to do this, need to take a chance with him, with something that's been developing for almost a year now. There are some things I am willing to let take a passive role in my life, but not this. Not something that could potentially do something so big for both of us. I'm tired of waiting, of hoping and wishing, of being disappointed. I just want to know.